Reflecting British Relationships

Have I told you I am obsessed with Englishmen? Well, now you know!

I am afraid to travel to UK and see you again, forgive me. I think your voice is so sexy on whatsapp. And your whole attitude of supportiveness throughout 2017 is sexy too. You know, ever since I moved away from your town, from your country and faced the reality of an adult working life. Too much of it. Too much to swallow. How I fought so I don't drain. How I grasped every single straw, that you or another kind person threw me. Travels and love and good people kept my head over water this year.

As I wrote on my hightlights 2017 list: travelling, self-improvement courses, blogging and love kept me going. Those things and you. Thanks for not breaking up as a foe.Thanks for lovely parcels and even more charming gifts inside. This Christmas I opened every single present and recognised myself in it, realised that you know me and how attentive you are, how special your gifts and greeting cards are. Yes, I am a fan of Cheshire (we both know which parts of it) and a crazy cat lady - but all that is beside the point, it is your care and how well you know me that's the focus point here.

Forgive me not travelling to London with you. Forgive me being worried to tell you i go to New-York, I secretly dreamt we'd somehow arrange a meet up there, in the USA. It was your and mine first time across the North Atlantic Ocean. I just did not want to irritate or change your travelling plans. I wish I did it in a different way. I wish I did not plan it the way it was originally set.

Leaving UK had its advantages, but it brought its losses and the price was high.

We had great times together! Evenings by the real fire place, fire and smell of wood, and how you used to educate me about the newest and most popular apps and stuff to get, our own language we developed, our journeys around UK and Europe... true friendship we still have.

Our trip to Venice. It was a dream come true. After such a hard time. Time of forced three months sitting at home, where every seldom outing beyond the house door was a blessing, and how you presented me this step-tracking gadget, I absolutely loved every move, every step, every sight and each 'n' every moment in in Italy, it was a paradise.

You and I were secretive, passionate, interesting, different and never mundane. 

Sorry we grew apart. You will always be my best of male friends.

Every folder of my backup pictures I look at, I remember how special it was. How you were driving me places, how you were giving me flowers to observe them evolve, how we spent time together at yours, at mine, in pubs and being out.

"I could fall, or I could fly... Here in your aeroplane... And I could live, I could die... Hanging on the words you say", and I know it is not a "+". It is rather a "÷" and you divided from I.

I need this kick, this fire to my life, I need to see you tomorrow. God bless the hours we spend together, starting a new year, a new us.